Rules

1. Listen, read, and see with an open heart. 

2. You are encouraged to affirm, sympathize, and empathize. Healing begins when a person feels heard and understood. 

3. You may be critical of systems, ideas, and behaviors of certain people if those things relate to the story that you are telling, but please remember that the main purpose here is to tell your story, not just to vent, and definitely not to label or condemn others. 

4. No denying someone else's experience. If your experience has been different, please share your experience in a separate post. 

5. No victim blaming. 

6. No fixing. If the OP asks for resources, you can provide some, but unless you are asked, you just listen. No resources should ever be suggested as the one and only right solution to the problem. 

7. This is not a place for debate about issues. If you are looking for a place for respectful debate, please let Jeannine know and she will give you info about a group for that.

Posts or comments in violation of these rules will be deleted.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Goals, Resolutions, and Mission: An Evolution

I read somewhere recently about how many of us struggle with goals because of how we approach them.  I know that for me, goals were heavily influenced “should” statements.  They were things that to a large extent were externally driven, things that I thought I needed to do and be because of the way I interacted with my culture. It’s not that I wasn’t taught how to set goals.  Mormons are big on goals overall, and I spent over 6 years from the age of 12-18 specifically setting and working on goals in a church program for young women called “Personal Progress.”  But goals weren’t enough for me to make the kind of progress I really needed. Take for example these goals that I found recently. Based on a few items included on the list, I assume these were set sometime between 1998 and 2000.  I’m also including some information about how I did with those goals. 5 year goals Begin concert career—Didn’t happen.   Full-time job with benefits—Nope Or enou...
Read more

True Listening

A friend asked some wonderful questions yesterday on Facebook. This morning, I took the time to answer.  Because this topic is so important to the mission of Gossamer Threads, I decided to share it here as well.   Lori wrote: " If you are so inclined to contemplate, I'd love to know your thoughts. Three-part question: 1. What does it mean to truly listen to another human being? 2. Have the majority of us ever properly learned how? When it comes to deeply-held belief differences, (politics, religion, football, music, etc) in conflict (in conflict is the key here) I am pretty sure the answer to #2 is no. I am being realistic (not pessimistic?). However. 3. Are there ways to listen, understand, empathize, and respect other deeply held beliefs when they are in direct conflict with yours? If so, what are those ways? Definition of key terms in this context: Listening: different than hearing. Listening is an active process where the listener makes a conscious decisi...
Read more

Spiritual Practice

This post was shared originally on the Exploring Sainthood blog (which no longer exists).  In this time of uncertainty and fear, spiritual practices can sustain us.  If you're not a religious person and the word "spiritual" doesn't feel right to you, think of this as deep and grounding self-care.  Use what works for you and leave the rest. I'm hoping to write a part 2 for this soon, sharing more ideas and the kinds of spiritual practice I'm engaging in right now. ______________ As I’ve mentioned before, one the blessings of attending a Unitarian Universalist church this last year has been the opportunity to get a broader perspective. The most interesting part is that I’m learning that my previously narrow views of what it meant to be Mormon and do things the Mormon way might not have been completely accurate. One of the responsibilities of membership at Unity Church-Unitarian is this: Cultivate a spiritual practice.  Attend to your spiritual/person...
Read more